Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Practicing observation
It's not as easy as one might think to write based on
observation. I still remember an exercise I did in freshman English in
high school. My teacher gave each group an orange and asked us to
examine it. We noticed the pebbled texture of the skin, examined the
wrinkling around the stem end, pulled away the layers of peel and
sticky white membrane, split apart a segment and poked with a pen tip
at the packets of juice lined up orderly as rows of corn. It takes
practice to see things this way though!
In order to write about a place, you first need to see it, and see the details that create its overall impact or impression. Window boxes with pink geraniums, cobbled streets, hand-carved wooden signs with names like the Yankee Drummer and the Likker Store (an ice cream shop), wrought iron lamposts--these all create a certain impression. To let your reader see the place you're describing, you need to give him or her those details, not just It was a nice town.
In my f2f classes we practiced by looking at images of the cosmetics store Lush. Here's a video (a little corny but with some views of a representative store):
and some images:
One student wrote
The merchandise is very colorful and bright, but the way it is displayed is messy. It looks too cluttered and crowded. They're stacked on each other way too high, which makes it look unappealing.
Note that someone who hasn't seen the pictures has by now no idea what he or she is talking about! Start with the big picture: what's the size and shape of the retail space? what building materials is it made from (floor, walls, ceiling)? what lighting? is there music playing (if so, what?), or other sounds? how about smells? tastes? does it logically divide into sections? What furniture does the room contain? How are products displayed? You need to describe the products (not every one, but a representative sample--in a clothing store, for example, you might describe what's on the mannequins, if that's how clothing is displayed). You need here to say that (in places) we see slabs of soap, unwrapped, like fudge almost, piled how high, what colors, and so forth. Look at the signs; note the use of black and white (the size of small, hand-held chalkboards that kids use); how would you describe the font used?; what are some of the names of the soaps?
Sometimes it's helpful to think about a similar place and how your place is different (in order to better see the distinguishing features of yours). So think about how Lush is different from Bath and Body Works, say. (Or how Price Rite is different from Stop and Stop is different from Whole Foods.) You won't be writing a comparison/contrast essay--you don't need to write about that second, similar place, but rather use your image of it to help you see what's in front of you in your place.
And one other thing I wanted to point out about that student sample. Notice how the writer seems to be inserting her own aesthetic judgment here. It may be difficult to avoid inadvertently making clear how you feel about the place, but generally it's preferable to try for a more objective description (because one person's cluttered is another's cozy, and you're not sure how your reader would feel about your space). What you are concerned with here, though, is how this space is or is not tailored to a particular type of customer and how it appeals to that customer.
In order to write about a place, you first need to see it, and see the details that create its overall impact or impression. Window boxes with pink geraniums, cobbled streets, hand-carved wooden signs with names like the Yankee Drummer and the Likker Store (an ice cream shop), wrought iron lamposts--these all create a certain impression. To let your reader see the place you're describing, you need to give him or her those details, not just It was a nice town.
In my f2f classes we practiced by looking at images of the cosmetics store Lush. Here's a video (a little corny but with some views of a representative store):
and some images:
One student wrote
The merchandise is very colorful and bright, but the way it is displayed is messy. It looks too cluttered and crowded. They're stacked on each other way too high, which makes it look unappealing.
Note that someone who hasn't seen the pictures has by now no idea what he or she is talking about! Start with the big picture: what's the size and shape of the retail space? what building materials is it made from (floor, walls, ceiling)? what lighting? is there music playing (if so, what?), or other sounds? how about smells? tastes? does it logically divide into sections? What furniture does the room contain? How are products displayed? You need to describe the products (not every one, but a representative sample--in a clothing store, for example, you might describe what's on the mannequins, if that's how clothing is displayed). You need here to say that (in places) we see slabs of soap, unwrapped, like fudge almost, piled how high, what colors, and so forth. Look at the signs; note the use of black and white (the size of small, hand-held chalkboards that kids use); how would you describe the font used?; what are some of the names of the soaps?
Sometimes it's helpful to think about a similar place and how your place is different (in order to better see the distinguishing features of yours). So think about how Lush is different from Bath and Body Works, say. (Or how Price Rite is different from Stop and Stop is different from Whole Foods.) You won't be writing a comparison/contrast essay--you don't need to write about that second, similar place, but rather use your image of it to help you see what's in front of you in your place.
And one other thing I wanted to point out about that student sample. Notice how the writer seems to be inserting her own aesthetic judgment here. It may be difficult to avoid inadvertently making clear how you feel about the place, but generally it's preferable to try for a more objective description (because one person's cluttered is another's cozy, and you're not sure how your reader would feel about your space). What you are concerned with here, though, is how this space is or is not tailored to a particular type of customer and how it appeals to that customer.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Thinking about memoir: showing and telling
"Show don't tell" is commonly given advice from writing teacher to student (or from writer to writer). to think about what this means, first read these guidelines from writing teacher Dennis Jerz. (Here's another link to try if Jerz's doesn't work...)
Then in the comments below--you may use your first name or sign in if you have a google account, etc.-- add your revisions to these sentences, trying to show the reader through sensory detail rather than telling the reader what to think or feel (or what you think or feel about something):
My hometown was a wonderful (or choose your own adjective) place to grow up.
Laci had a rather eccentric style.
Mr. Brown is the worst teacher I've ever had.
The room seemed very institutional.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Then read "Killing Chickens," an essay/chapter from Meredith Hall's memoir Without a Map. Pay attention to where the writer shows and where she tells. In a MS Word file (to be printed out at the end of class) answer the following questions:
Then in the comments below--you may use your first name or sign in if you have a google account, etc.-- add your revisions to these sentences, trying to show the reader through sensory detail rather than telling the reader what to think or feel (or what you think or feel about something):
My hometown was a wonderful (or choose your own adjective) place to grow up.
Laci had a rather eccentric style.
Mr. Brown is the worst teacher I've ever had.
The room seemed very institutional.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Then read "Killing Chickens," an essay/chapter from Meredith Hall's memoir Without a Map. Pay attention to where the writer shows and where she tells. In a MS Word file (to be printed out at the end of class) answer the following questions:
- Copy and paste three examples of particularly effective details or images, where you can clearly see or hear or smell what the writer is describing.
- Copy and paste a couple examples of "telling" sentences, especially general statements that seem to get at the general message of the essay.
- Comment on the essay's structure. What are the events that string together to make the essay's narrative? What is the setting or settings, and how does the writer shift between them
- What do you think the essay is about? (In other words, probably none of you have killed chickens, but how does her somewhat unusual experience tie to your own life? Can you articulate what she seems to be saying about more universal human experiences than just chicken murder?)
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Prewriting play in computer lab
Regular
writing sites
- · 100 words
- · Six sentences
- · 40 x 365 (Make a list of people in your life; try to capture the essence of each in only 100 words)
- · Writing prompts from Writer’s Digest
- · Daily writing prompts from Writingfix.com
Look over samples, read writer’s guidelines, and do
a couple of each. (You might even want to submit or join!)
Photo-inspiration
Go
to flickr.com or some other photo-sharing
site. Pick a word and search through the photos for one that interests you. Try
colors (blue, maroon), emotions, abstractions (independence, silence), types of
food, family relationships, whatever. Write down a memory that the picture
evokes, the imagined thoughts of a person in the picture, a string of images
that the picture brings to your mind, …
Nonfiction
sites
Browse through
the archives at Brevity or This I Believe. Look for a title
that intrigues you and write your own post based on that title (or a variation
of it). Make a list of memires that come to mind as you browse through these
short pieces.
Graphic
organizers
Play
around with one or more of the following:
Try mapping a difficult decision you have made, or
the stages that you went through in some learning process.
List-making
Make a list of the significant objects in your life
or the people who have taught you something. Make a list of the places that
have been important to you throughout your life. Make a list of your endings
and beginnings.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
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